9 March 2019
Saturday after Ash Wednesday
Levi the tax collector (known better as St. Matthew), the lover of money, finds a greater treasure: Jesus. The one who once collected money has been collected by the One who seeks to gather the souls He holds as being more precious than His own life. “Follow me!” Jesus tells him, and Levi follows. And where do they go? Back to Levi’s house, to a feast of celebration, for the tax collector realized that the Bridegroom was in his midst. The Pharisees, however, were blind; Levi had allowed the mercy of Jesus to remove the splinter from his eye yet the Pharisees could not see for the plank in their own. In the light of Christ’s merciful gaze Levi saw the sickness of his own soul; the Pharisees saw the same, but could not see their own, for their pride blinded them. It was not until the tax collector recognized his own poverty, his own need for a Savior, that he became truly rich; the Pharisees believed themselves already to be rich, when in truth they are tragically impoverished.
And so Jesus says to them, essentially, “I did not come for you.” After all, if one does not believe they need a Savior, what can a Savior do for them? We can fall into this same trap: we can assure ourselves of our own holiness, our own sufficiency, and instead of joining Levi and the feast of joyful sinners, we stand against the wall questioning Jesus’ social awareness. Instead of letting go of our own pride and following Jesus, we say “no thank you” and continue on our own way. “I’m a good person,” we say, as we go yet another week without confession, “I haven’t done anything very wrong.” Or we say “I believe in God” yet this belief does not manifest itself in our life in any significant way except when we tell people of our belief. We see ourselves as being “well enough” and in no need of a physician; Levi was well enough but his encounter with Jesus made him realize he had a terminal illness of the soul: sin. He recognized a deeper hunger than money and food could satisfy, a thirst that nothing could quench.
Do we recognize the same in ourselves? Do we recognize our need for Jesus? This is what Lent is all about: by fasting, by praying, by almsgiving, by detaching ourselves from worldly things we better realize our absolute need for Jesus and perhaps, by the grace of God, this need will awaken a desire for Him. If we can do this, if we can, like Levi, get up from our spiritual complacency and follow Jesus wherever He leads us, if we can leave behind the things we rely on more than we rely on our Savior, then what sorrow we might experience on Good Friday! When we remember and reflect upon the price He paid so that we might, if we allow the truth to pierce our hearts, know the depth of His love! And what joy we might know on Easter when we reflect upon the riches He promises us if we would but hold out our hearts as beggar’s hands to receive in humble poverty what we so often refuse in complacent pride!
St. Matthew, pray for us! Pray that we might repent of our sins, our pride, and anything of this world that removes us from Jesus. Pray for us this Lent that we, like you, might follow Jesus more closely, even to the Cross, that we might rejoice in His victory over sin and death.