“Jesus knew that among the Twelve Apostles there was one who did not believe: Judas. Judas could have gone away as did many of the disciples had done. Indeed, perhaps if he had been honest, he would have been bound to leave. Instead he stayed on with Jesus. He did not stay out of faith or out of love, but rather with the secret intention of seeking revenge on the Teacher. Why? Judas felt let down by Jesus and decided that he, in his turn, would betray Jesus. Judas was a zealot and he wanted a victorious Messiah who would lead a revolt against the Romans. Jesus had not measured up to these expectations. The problem was that Judas did not go away and his greatest sin was his deceitfulness, which is the mark of the Devil. For this reason Jesus said to the Twelve: “One of you is a devil” (Jn 6:70).” (Pope Benedict XVI, Angelus at Castel Gandolfo, August 26 2012)
Today is the Spy Wednesday, in reference to Judas Iscariot’s intent to betray Jesus. Presumably, this day get its name because of the sneaky actions of Judas and his actions conjured up the image of a spy. But I think that there is something more important to reflect on this day than Judas’ sneakiness. In the Gospel of Matthew, we hear that Jesus said, “the Son of Man indeed goes, as it is written of him.” This passage might be puzzling because if Jesus is going to Golgotha by his own will, then it should not be blamed on Judas. Judas did indeed bring about something bad, but Jesus freely did what was ordained to pass. This passage must be understood with the following passage about punishment. Jesus said, “but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed. It would be better for that man if he had never been born.”
St. Augustine in his Treatise on Free Will explained that when we choose something based on our free will, we usually choose something that we believe will bring us happiness. In other words, something that we did not choose is far from happiness. Judas chose to betray Jesus based on his free will. If we follow Augustine’s logic, he presumed that betraying Jesus would bring him closer to happiness. On the contrary, Jesus said it will be better if he had never been born. St. Thomas Aquinas has an interesting observation on this point. He argued that a choice is made from that which is perceived to be good (Commentary on Matthew Gospel Chapter 26, Lecture 2). For instance, a man with a fever caused by the coronavirus would obviously choose to not have a fever, because the fever brings him misery. In other words, it will be better not to be in misery with a high fever. When Jesus said that it would have been better for Judas not to be born, it means that it would have been better for Judas to not be in misery because his association with evil and the betrayal of Jesus will bring Judas to misery.
The early Church Father, Papias of Hierapolis, writes in his Expositions of the Sayings of the Lord a tradition about the death of Judas that is different from what we find in both Matt 27:3–10 and Acts 1:18–20. Papias wrote that Judas was afflicted by God’s wrath as the punishment for his betrayal of Jesus, his body becoming “inflamed in the flesh”—so large that he could not walk through narrow streets. His eyes were swollen shut. His genitals became enormously swollen and filled with pus and worms. Under these circumstances, then it would have been better for Judas not to have been born than to suffer in a terrible misery like what Papias described. Papias’s story was well known among Christians in antiquity. However, the Church does not recognize it as official tradition. While the New Testament did not adhere to Papias’s story, Judas’s betrayal of Jesus brought him everlasting destruction. St. Thomas Aquinas explained that by betraying Jesus, Judas became the abuser of grace. Judas was made reprobate because he died without grace. Judas died without grace, not because of God’s unwillingness to provide grace, but because of Judas’s unwillingness to accept it (St. Thomas Aquinas, De veritate, q. 6, art. 2, obj. 11).
Like Judas, each of us can reject God’s grace and create our own hell. Let us take our own fault and inadequacy and imagine the consequences if those vices and faults get an upper hand in our lives. Imagine your own little hell to which we could descendent. Know too that we can always embrace God’s grace when we fall off the path and return to Jesus Christ. As you listen again to today’s Gospel, reflect on the concept of Spy Wednesday. Notice any passage that speaks to you personally, especially in the face of coronavirus pandemic that is afflicting the world. Bring all your thoughts and feelings to Christ.